Saturday, October 11, 2008

A Reminder

Happy Autumn!

Today I got a massage. I have been getting regular full-body massages at my chiropractor for over a year now. By regular, I mean I do everything in my human power to go once a week (Yay for MESSA!). My massage therapist is named Rose, and she works in the office a few days a week. Well, today I really needed my massage. I am coming off of a very stressful few weeks, worrying about Scarlet's health, and the economy is falling to pieces, and just life is feeling not so free and easy at the moment! When Slade was born, he was so sweet! (Do you remember those cheeks!?) With all that sweetness, he was a hefty little dude and because he was so sick, I carried him on my hip for a long time. That, compounded with the fact that he took his own sweet time in walking (14 months), I held him forever, and in doing so, damaged my right shoulder. I don't know all the muscle names off the top of my head, but it hurts like h-e-double hockey sticks, and when I am under a lot of stress or tired, it flares up. Sometimes my dad and his pseudo-chiropractic ways help a lot, and sometimes nothing helps except getting rid of the stress and chilling out, a lot of ice, and ibuprofen. And my massage. Today, Rose helped more than that, though. I try to keep the whole "my kids are a sickly crew, well not really sick, but they have airways that react too strongly to a list of whatever" conversation to a minimum. It always takes a long time, people ask stupid questions, and then I get irritated and mad about the whole thing over and over, so I just say we are doing "okay" most of the time. Today, the minute she put her hands on me, she said, "What's wrong? Why are you so stressed? Your shoulder is awful!" So I told her the short version of Scarlet and the boys. I have been beating myself up a lot in the last two weeks. For working, for having "faulty" children, for not being able to prevent my kids from having to deal with this crud, for not being perfect. Yes, I know, nobody's perfect! I don't want to go all super-spiritual on blogpot or anything, but I do believe that we are not here randomly living out our days on Earth. I believe I have a multi-fold purpose, not yet fully realized, and I think everything happens for a reason. I don't have a clue why I have to be the one to know so much about RAD through my kids, but I will find out one day, that's for sure.

Back to the story. Rose, who is the mom of one of my former students (5 kids, actually), runs a farm with her husband and is a wonderful person, was appropriaty sympathetic, like most people. She always makes me feel so good about being there, and I appreciate that about her. And then she said something so simple: "You know what the problem is, you're experienced in it, and you know that things will get better. It's a blessing, actually, isn't it?"

Yes, I guess it is.

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